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Note: This article is long and has several fun video clips. I recommend you get a cocktail, take your time, and prepare to laugh. The Question: I was never very keen on Mrs. Kindt (our high school history teacher), but I also have to admit I wasn’t a particularly good history student. However, she said something one time that really stuck with me. She was discussing two political principles that are commonly presented as polar opposites. (I’ve forgotten the exact topic, unfortunately.) She argued that while the two were, indeed, opposing viewpoints, one could actually become the other if taken to a far enough extreme. Rather than thinking of the two things as a bar magnet, she suggested a clock instead. I thought that was a fascinating idea. Let’s say, for example, we wanted to use the clock model to describe whether something is good or bad. Assume that 12:00 PM represents the absolute best. 3:00 PM would be good, but not great. Things that are perfectly mediocre would be plotted at 6:00 PM. 9:00 PM would be crappy, while things that are horrifically terrible would be found at 11:59 PM. Bad, of course, is diametrically opposed to good, but viewed through the clock model, something could be so bad that it becomes good (The clock would roll over to 12:01 AM and suddenly fall into good territory). That bizarre area would be a counter-intuitive subversion of good and bad: gad-bood. I’ve thought quite a lot about this, and I’m sure people can come up with many examples of gad-boodness. This clip, in my opinion, is a wonderful example of gad-boodness: It’s a promotional video for a neti pot. I’m disappointed to report that it has been edited; the original ended with the creepy non-blinking robot doing stretching exercises to ensure that all of the snot gets out of her head. True story. The video is so bad it is actually good. Importantly, gad-boodness has to be created by accident. Satire, for...
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Question: When you write, you always use “he” when you write about Mel. Shouldn’t you use “she” before Mel transitioned and “he” after? Anonymous Answer: First of all, thanks for asking. There was a moment in time when we actually changed pronouns. I designed this with Mel’s mother and it was for us, not for Mel. It felt so hokey to wake up one day and change pronouns but it was starting to be weird. We went on one very memorable camping trip where half of the people were calling Mel “she” and half were calling Mel “he.” I tried not to use any pronouns at all. It was weird. So, on Labor Day, Mel’s mom came for a visit and we took the plunge. We started the process to change pronouns. I have to say it was a messy business. For several years I worried I would slip up and say the wrong pronoun. Mel has always been incredibly gracious about this but I have felt like I would fail him with a wrong pronoun. But now, I don’t slip. He is firmly placed in the “male” category in my mind. Somehow, I can’t go back and call Mel “she.” For me now, Mel was never a “she.” He has always been the exact same person he is now. And I feel like we righted a wrong and I have no desire to go back to a “wrong” construct. So, when I talk about Mel, I might talk about before he transitioned but he never wanted to be “she” and now I never want to go back either. So in my stories, Mel will always be “he.” Melanie The Crucible Bookii is my story as it continues to unfold and how I see the world from my perch on the edge of the Crucible…because falling in love changed everything. To read more about our story, may I suggest Unlikely Renewal of...
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A friend was over today and asked him just this question. I was also curious about his answer.
He said he felt vulnerable and exposed and a little nervous. He talked about the difference between Jerry Springer and Oprah Winfrey. We asked him what he meant.
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You can ask me anything, don’t be shy. I may choose not to answer it, but as my teachers used to say, “There are no dumb questions.” Now if you have ever been in an adult course, you know this is just not true because I have heard some really dumb questions in my day. But they’re usually asked by the guy who has been checking his email all day on his smart phone instead of paying attention. So I am absolutely sure you won’t be asking dumb questions. I’ll answer the questions I think are most helpful to Crucible Members. By being willing to ask questions, you help create the story on the Crucible. Thanks for participating. Submit a...
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